Why you ask... because if he busts my balls one more fucking time, out of nowhere, I might have to ban him from my office.
For Example:
Thursday night, a woman comes up to me talking about how she wants to take her mother out this weekend so she can go with the grand kids and great grand kids to the
Naples Zoo..
but she wasn't sure if her mother would be able to make it the whole day.
I told her that I LOVED the Zoo and that it has been sooo long since I have been and it sounded like a great idea.
Then, all of a sudden, Gerry busts out with this....
"Lisa, you CANT go to the Zoo"
"Why not Gerry?"
"Because your not married."
"Why do I need to be married to go to the Zoo Gerry?"
"Because, your chances of getting Mauled by a Tiger are better than you getting married after 30... and we like you, we don't want you to be mauled by a tiger... so don't go!"
Now, I don't know what the FUCK Gerry was thinking when he decided to come up with this shit but when I said nothing and just sat here with my mouth wide open and just starred at him, he started laughing.
Mauled by a FUCKING TIGER GERRY !!!!
FUCKING REALLY !!!!
You Old Dirty Bastard..
I am more likely to get MAULED by a FUCKING TIGER
than I am likely to get married
now that I am over 30. You sack of shit..lol.. is that what you told your 3rd wife when she agreed to marry your sorry ass...lol.. asshat..
I told him that I would not take offense to it because I was SURE there was some type of compliment in that statement somewhere.. something about the they liking me and not wanting me to die...lol...
He started laughing so hard that he had to go use the rest room.. he said he would be back.. and when he came, who the fuck did he bring but smart ass Mr. T.
FUCK !!!!!
Just what I needed at that time.. was a snickering Mr. Fucking T. He was cracking up.. said that I shouldn't worry because Once I hit 90, I'm more likely just to DIE instead of get married.
He said that I shouldn't even get married.. it's not worth it.. just live in sin and have babies..lol.. craziness.. all of it.
So, I assured Gerry and Mr. T that I would NOT be going to the ZOO anytime soon and that I would try to stay away from the wild roaming Tigers that live here in South West Florida.
It kills me that back in the day these bastards got married due to "Honeymoon Babies" and now they are telling me not to even get married... just to live in sin..lol.. Times sure have changed, especially when some of my old school woman are telling me not to get married as well.... woman who's reputations and virtues were protected by marriage.. telling me to fuck it.. not to do it..lol..
When some of my other residents heard us cracking up laughing in my office, they came to check out what the ruckus was all about and next thing you know, we are having a 2 hour conversation about how today differs from 50-60 years ago.. how children today have no respect for their elders, no respect or knowledge of history.. so on and so forth.
Then, my Old Lady Olive says,
"It was the Freaking Hippies that did us in... this is ALL their fault !"
lol.. Awesome !!
